My Place

By Eddy Taylor

 I’ve watched Him all night, every night. Been by his side when comes home, I wait for him after he leaves. I eat when he eats, run when he runs, walk when he walks, talk when he talks and rest when he rests, my life is his to command. Now he commands me to watch and wait for Their arrival. I climb onto the bed and curl up beside him, burying myself into the duvet he has warmed for me. A finger gently brushes against my ear, sharing the rhythm of his heart and the touch of his warmth with me. I hear his breath; slow but consistent. I match it, our air meeting on the same space at the same moment, a collision of life. He smiles, just a little but I catch it. A slight curve in his lips, a far cry from the beaming grin I’m used to, but I know it’s the same smile, even if this is all he can manage now. I nuzzle my head against his shoulder; the curve extends by just a fraction of its size but it’s enough. The message is clear: he’s happy I’m here.

Wind shoots through the open window. It’s only a breeze but it’s enough to send a stark shiver him and into me. I twitch, then sit up and stare at the window. Another wave of outside air, stealing the breaths we’ve sheared and scattering them across the room. I will not let the wind take this moment from us. I climb over him and drop down before the window. The crack is barely wide enough to fit my nose, but it’s enough to let the wind invade our space. I cry out to him; be he just groans and turns in the bed. Perhaps it is irrational, but I can feel Them coming. Perhaps they are already inside the house? I must be quick. I need to keep as much of him as I can for as long as I can. I climb the edge of the window and pull at the lift, but it will not close. I pull harder, there is a familiar scratching sound but only for a moment, the crack is now only half a nose in size. As I go to pull again, I freeze.

The room goes dark and cold, as if someone had put out the stars. I turn. There They are, standing in the doorway. Though I knew they were coming I had a hope that they would wait until I was asleep. They look over to me and grin a grim reconstruction of his smile. But I understand what it means. It’s time. I close my mouth and take care to bow as they cross the room to the bed.

“Will he be, okay?” I ask in moment on impertinence.

They stop at the end of the bed and look back at me. They stretch out a hand and wave me over to them. I obey, as is my duty and sit below the outstretched hand to watch as they lean over the bed. They hold out their free arm, they draw back, and I see Him sit up. I cock my head and look into his mouth, the same mouth that used to embrace me and pet me and share the days with me. The curve in the lips is almost complete, the message is the same but somehow louder. He is happy I’m here.

His legs touch the floor, I rub against them, lingering on this familiar sensation, taking care to remember every texture and shape. He starts to walk, and I follow. We reach the doorway. He steps through. He vanishes along with the world beyond the frame. No final glace, no last words, just that little smile. Now I am alone. The room turns warm once more, but I can’t focus. I try to fix my eyes to the doorway as my vision blurs, but the strain is too much. I lay myself down at what is now the edge of the world and look out into the darkness that I am left with.

Time passes. I don’t know how long. It’s still dark when They return. They touch my ear, and I sit up.

“Can I come with you?”

They look down at me and turn back to the door. Disappearing in complete silence. I would have liked to have gone with Him. But my place is here it seems.